Where to go from here?

Facelift?

Growth?

Busyness?

Change coming?

As you can see a lot has been updated lately. I have had a lot of time to think about what to do with this little space of mine. I look back and realize I have been blogging since 2004/2005 and it started out just little family things. Pictures of life and daily ramblings of my life as a young mother of ONE... then it slightly fell off when we made our HUGE move north and I then had TWO kiddos and a marriage falling apart. I met so many amazing women through our little family blogs before blogging exploded across the blogosphere and the driven aspect felt it shifted from sharing families and a connection of moms to earning money in blogging and forced writing.

I felt hard to get back into the groove of it when I so desperately wanted to reach out and not feel alone anymore. I found some of my old blogger buddies through some blogs that were still up and running like we used, and then through Facebook. It felt great to reconnect and see how our children have grown and still alike in so many way across the country.

But then due to my marriage story I felt guarded to share any of my family like I once had and played it sly in fear of being "found". Living your life in fear is not fun at all. I have always longed to throw myself back out there like I once did, but still haven't... not here fully anyway. No family ever read our blog and it felt that blogging friends across the country knew more about us then family even cared too so I took our family blog off and God lead me to start Scripted Heart in 2009.

During our marriage tough spot God revealed how my heart, your heart, our hearts have all been Scripted by him and that we are living out His words (Psalm 139:16). He told me to share our story and along the way start to share our life journey in homeschooling (ending our 7th year currently... wow!) and so forth, but overtime it comes to sharing that I stumble over my words and pictures I so desperately want to share. I get all tongue twisted or scared again. I don't feel equipped, if you will, to share like I once had. Instagram has helped give me that chance to share like I want to do on here...

Oh how I long to share so much here too! To share my struggles and triumph... isn't that what God asked me to share in the first place!? Why is it such a hold up for me?

I make excuses most days on why I walked away from photography, blog design, posting, and being online in general... "I have an awkwardly placed iMac that isn't in a spot that screams come sit at me like you used to..." now, don't miss read that... the time off the screen has been great but I feel sometimes I miss "logging memories" or documenting things I want to remember or pass on. Of course there is paper and pens available but I make excuses for that too. I'm lame I know. But nothing seems in a location I can just put things up like I desire. Ugh. The same thing happened with my photography and working with my photos and all.

I vent all of that to say... I feel I need to change that and jump over my mental fear roadblock. I think God has a lot he wants to share with me... with you... with everyone, and I am letting Satan win when I make the excuses. I know, I've said it all before but God keeps pushing it despite all of my pushing back. So, I guess we see what he has in mind, and in the process I figured a fresh look was a great place to start it off....