Need to refocus

Plain and simple life is hard.

Don't let anyone tell you differently.

Emotional high one second... crashing to the bottom the next.

Feeling like we are flapping on the verge of staying put and flying off in the wind.

Satan has been having a hay day over here the last couple days. Thursday the high was indescribable and while it still is in some aspects Satan has been knocking things around and let's just say the confidence is so much lower than it has been for weeks. The free feeling and feeling of peace as definitely lost some power points. The green energy bar is most certainly in the yellow beeping as it is nearing red!

Thursday was a phenomenal hit. The door has not been closed at all but a speed bump has definitely been thrown our way. One that could very well be positive but it has taken some pep from our steps. Sadly Satan has won the last couple days. We have said over and over again that no matter the outcome of our action on the submit button we would praise God and be content and thankful for whatever the answer.

Satan is testing that theory full force.

Feeling defeated at home... at work... with self. All things my husband sadly admitted to me last night he has been feeling the last couple days. Unfortunately, I have played a major role in that jumping at uncomfortable feelings Satan has been throwing my way. It's been ugly. It's so sad too because the high and excitement we all had on Thursday was like nothing any of us have ever felt before. By late Saturday night till last night that was all out the window!

I have so much to work on. We both are praying like crazy to be brought back to the place of peace we have felt unbelievably for the last 2 1/2 weeks. Total surrender and although we haven't tried taking up the wheel ourselves the peace has definitely been shaken.

I have no idea what is going on with the submit button, but whatever it is Satan is having a hay day with messing up the peace foundation that has been in firm place for weeks now. There is a chance that one way or another we could have an answer about a direction for our future this week. That alone is nerve wracking. Throw in all the rest of what has been going and it's unsettling to say the least.

I am in need some deep worship time. Big time.

This script... This time in our lives has been like nothing I have ever experienced. I want, if nothing else, to have this story be a light for those in need or are going through the same thing. Once we hear an answer though I promise to lay out in detail all the crazy awesome things God has been doing during this time. The reason I haven't so far is because God has laid it on our hearts to not get cocky and over confident through it all. His answer could go either way.

I need to refocus and get my heart and mind back to the place of serenity it's been for the last couple weeks. The places they have been the last couple days have been horrible.

Whatever the answer.

Whatever the decision.

If God stops right now and says this is as far as I was taking you... We WILL be ok.... We WILL accept and be happy.

No matter what!

"We WILL praise God whether we win or lose."

I will not allow Satan to win any longer!!

We are going to close the gap and not be hanging any longer. We will move both feet back to solid ground.