Lots on my heart... How to get it out?

I want to write but I don't know what to say. The words feel locked away trying to formulate before they come out. The dicml amount of pictures on the camera this year are breaking my heart and the memories of all we got to do compared to the nothing this year, as the months is pretty much over now, is burning into my heart. Of course we haven't done nothing, but still feels that way. I haven't documented anything on here (or my never read or written on family blog). I have not picked up my camera nearly enough. Life has been crazy. Busy and not busy all at the same time. Is that even possible!?

We are preparing this week not only for the celebration of the birth of our Savior but also for the birth of my best friend's 4th child. Tomorrow morning I will add 4 strapping young men to my household, even for a short while, while mommy and daddy to be, along with aunt, are at the hospital anxiously awaiting the "HE'S HERE" moment. I have not 100% figured out how I will fill such time with these young men + my 3 but I think all will be good. :)

I have been busy handwriting Christmas cards, and writing out and praying over our new finances this week. Last week we made 4 different kinds of cookies to send to Grandpa. It was awesome! One kind in particular was a recipe my grandma used to make for us. It's been the first year I was able to make them for my family. It brought along a since of "yes, I can finally pass these down to my own family!" Along with "It's totally finally Christmas!"

On Sunday, we went back to the first church that we tried when we first moved. It felt right there. We have been to a total of 3 different churches since being here. All within the Calvary Chapel family we are accustom to. This one feels right so far. The kids love it and we have enjoyed the 2 services we have been to. We are planning on attending their Candlelight service on Saturday, and Christmas Day service. We haven't felt the "this is your new church home" feeling quite yet, but it definitely feels like where we are supposed to be right now, and truthfully I am ok with that. The peace that comes with it is beautiful!

Work life is going good. The company itself threw a crazy wrench on Friday. We are not 100% sure what this means, but we have found peace in knowing that God knew all about this way before we even applied for this job. He was so loud and adamant about us taking this job and moving here that we know he will not let us fail. He has a plan and we are excited (yet I won't lie anxious) to see what is to come in the following months. We keep a listening ear open to all the reports and are just letting our hearts listen and watch for God's plan in all of this. Right now it's busy as usual which alone has been great. :)

School this week has taken the plan of light! With the coming of 4 additional children into our household I am taking the path of least residence with school work. I am hoping to get caught back up after Christmas and be done on time this year. I am bracing my heart for that to not be, but hoping just the same.

So many things I can't wait to get back to a normal feel. Ugh, my daunting still to-do.... we moved to a new state... list. You know the one... change licenses, plates, call the new insurance agent to rewrite policy, find a new dentist, etc. I can't wait for that to be over! Picking up my camera again. I miss it so much. I feel blah with taking pictures though. In a rut. I was told before we moved not to let it go but I have. I want to love taking pictures again. I miss it. School. Ha, having any type of furniture to sit on. That would be lovely. We are praying for peace if God doesn't have that planned, but hopeful on that as well. We have no chairs, table, or couch. The floor is our friend, as well as one rolling tool box. I don't say this for pity or to complain... We genuinely are happy for a roof and this new adventure. There are times it just hits that we don't have any of it anymore, right now. We know we will again someday. Just aren't sure when that someday will be. So it sounds funny but don't take your furniture for granted.

I better get going. The house is still quiet as we have one little guy with a double ear infection (cause you know why not get one a couple weeks before insurance takes affect), another little guy with a cough and stuffy nose, and a little girl with a stuffy nose. I am letting them sleep. This also means momma can get a shower before 3pm. Score! Or a more realistic approach might be that I go snuggle back under the covers and use the light of my phone to not wake the sleeping babe in my bed currently, and continue reading Mary Beth Chapman's book "Choosing to SEE". Fabulous book!!!!! Seriously go read it!

I am starting to think of all the plans I hope to stick to in this coming year. Lots of them (yes, including becoming a better blogger *sorry I haven't been one). You?

One I am super... SUPER... excited about is I mentioned last night to my family I want to read the Bible from cover to cover. I have never done it. Yet. The response of "but I want to too." "Can we read it with you!?" from the husband, 8 year old, and 4 year old were amazing. My simple desire for myself has not turned into a family desire. We will be, as a family, reading the Bible in its entirety this coming year. We can't wait!!

How about you? Any plans you hope to set in place for the new year?